
1. The night is darkest before the dawn
2. Bad guys aim for the ground in front of you
3. Aliens understand the significance of the White House
4. Dr. Alan Grant won't leave you
5. Kids are creepy
6. Prostitution is romantic
7. The kid you picked on in middle school will kill all your friends on a national holiday
8. Big Kahuna Burger doesn't have a breakfast menu

9. His name is Robert Paulson
10. Never ever feed them after midnight
11. Rebellion wins the girl
12. Conformity wins the boy
13. Stay on target
14. Anything other than the heart & the head is a flesh wound
15. Beware the moon
16. If it bleeds we can kill it
17. Don't cross the streams

18. They all float
19. A chocolate bar weighs 21 grams
20. The human head weighs 8 pounds
21. Forts don't got carpet
22. It's your baby
23. Marry & reproduce

24. A boy's best friend is his mother
25. A man who doesn't spend time with his family can never be a real man
26. There is no spoon
27. Don't fall asleep

28. Charlie don't surf
29. Lick your palms
30. The eye in the sky is watching us all

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